16 August 2018

I Don’t Represent You and That’s OK

The Low Country Socialite

I’d like to get away from the idea that as a black woman and a plus size woman, I represent all black women and plus size women.  I see tons of videos of black women and/or plus size woman twerking or cursing or any other perceived “naughty” behavior on social media.  The comment sections are littered with those that feel that these women are a poor reflection of what Black or plus size women should be.  Why?  For one, what someone does for a few minutes on social media is a pretty poor reflection of who they actually are and also, the whole “ladylike” is just completely overrated but that’s a whole other topic to explore. 

The Low Country Socialite

I use the hashtag #RepresentationMatters because I do think that representation is important but I also think that “what” I represent is a lot different than “who” I represent.  I am a black, plus size woman and I am very proud to be those things but I am soooooo much more.  I represent what I am at different times of the day, at different times of the year, in different moods and in different relationships.  Sometimes I’m a workaholic and sometimes I’m lazy.  Sometimes I’m super sweet and sometimes I’m super shady.  Sometimes I like doing hoodrat things with my friends and sometimes I like being exceptionally empowering to other women. 

The Low Country Socialite

I can’t shoulder the burden of the “who” I represent.  It’s too much and no one should feel like they HAVE to do it.  I can’t represent all black and/or plus size women.  We are entirely too diverse to be put into a box like that.  So, I want to give a blessing to anyone who feels that they are obligated to represent something bigger especially when it is representation that they DIDN’T sign up for.  It’s a lot of pressure just to walk through the world and so many people feel this pressure in its extreme form whether others acknowledge it or not.  Not just Blacks or plus size people- but women, minorities, LGBTQ, etc.  Existing is hard enough without feeling that you have to represent everyone that looks like you whenever you do something in public.  Allow yourself the freedom to be a multifaceted individual.  Chill, you're not making (insert Blacks, Big Girls, Gays, etc.) look bad, friend.

The Low Country Socialite

The Low Country Socialite

The Low Country Socialite

Jacket & Pants: Belk

Earrings:  Kitsch

Shoes:  Payless ShoeSource

Lippie:  Bacca by Stila Cosmetics

What about you?  Are there things that you are tired of representing?


Until Next Time... 

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